I am starting to fell better now that things are starting to calm down. The more stress I have the more my symptoms act up. I had an allergic reaction to my blood transfusion, which gave me a rash all over me but that has passed thankfully... was tired of itching! lol
My grandmother got put into the hospital Sunday with CHF (congestive heart failure) and pneumonia. I am glad that she listens to my advice but I am not sure why me out of all of the family but I am glad she does because now shes getting the treatment she needs. I wish I could be at the hospital with her more so that I knew she was getting the best care and feel like I am letting her down by not being there.
When she was feeling very ill grandma said she was ready to give up.... that breaks my heart because on one hand I want to shake her and tell her you have to keep fighting..... for me for the grandbabies.... but on the other hand I can relate to how she feels and have come to realize when that time comes it is only her choice she can not continue to live for me or for any one else but herself just like I have had to tell bobby when the time comes where I have had enough he has to let it be my choice and just be as supportive as he can be which I know is a horribly hard thing to do in any case.
On another note having to go see a GI doctor to see if maybe that is where I am losing all my blood... it's like a vampire comes every night and just sucks the life out of me lol
" Tomorrow is another day but for today I am gonna keep on trying"
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